The Tourists.

Once Satan and Moloch1
Set out on their rambles,2
To refresh their old hearts3
With a view of our gambols ;4
For of late they had seen5
But a few of the men6
Who once brought the news7
Of this world to their den.8
Since Napoleon “ Le Grand”9
They had scarcely a hero ;10
In fact, the world’s glories11
Were sinking to zero.12
So they came up to see13
What their old friends were doing,14
What mischief the soldiers15
And statesmen were brewing.16
As they rose in the East,17
Moloch stepp’d on a skull ;18
Aha ! ” said the fiend,19
I see signs of Stamboul.”20
Satan kick’d it away,21
And exclaim’d with a sneer,22
That skull was Mahmoud’s,23
Once my fav’rite Vizier.24
He murder’d his friends25
And he crouch’d to his foes ;26
The Sun of his Empire27
Went down, when he rose.28
And now Earth’s crown’d idiots29
Will fight on his grave,30
But to see which shall prove31
Most the tyrant or slave.”32
When they rambled to Russia,33
And saw its gay Czar,34
Like a prince of the Opera,35
All riband and star,36
Said Satan, “ This son37
Of the regions of sleet38
Has one-half of the world39
For a toy at his feet ;40
Not content with the half,41
He’s resolved to have all ;42
Though cities may burn,43
And millions may fall.”44
That will do,” cried the pair,45
As they snuff’d up the gore ;46
Satan roar’d with delight—47
Moloch echo’d the roar.48
Then they rambled to France ;49
All was fertile and fair ;50
The fields were all harvest,51
All fragrance the air.52
’Twas a sting to their hearts,53
And each cried with a groan,54
What blockhead of clay55
Can deserve such a throne ? ”56
But they heard a wild shout,57
Smoke darken’d the sun,58
They heard the guns thunder,59
The war was begun !60
There was slaughter on sea,61
And slaughter on shore ;62
And the two rovers laugh’d63
Louder still than before.64
Then they rambled to England,65
Ah ! here all is sage,”66
Said the pair. “ All is Mind,67
In advance of the age.”68
They saw loveliness spread69
On the hill and the dale,70
The church on the mount,71
And the cot in the vale.72
They saw the proud forest73
Of masts on the Thames,74
They saw its bold people,75
Like earth’s beacon flames.76
But they look’d on the reptiles77
That crept round Whitehall !78
And then they laugh’d longest79
And loudest of all.80